It has been a long year. Oscar lost his job in February, developed Long COVID in June, and is unable to work. The family depends on his spouse’s single salary. He has every reason to be an angry, bitter man. But instead, Oscar adapted to his new circumstances. He calls it “Having hope in the ‘I don’t Know’.” Given how he grew up, this is not that strange.
Oscar’s family understood and appreciated the “I don’t know” about life. His Mom and Dad were very honest with him. If they could not answer his questions, they replied with “I don’t know.” If possible, they would help Oscar find an answer. But they were also very comfortable with “I don’t know.” For them, there was a lot of mystery in life. And Oscar learned to appreciate a good mystery.
Oscar was named after his Great-Grandfather, who immigrated from Ireland because of the Potato famine. Great-Grandpa, his daughters, and sons made their way in a new world that was a real mystery to them. They made do with what they had and created new lives. Their story tells of generations of resilience in the face of adversity. Oscar was very fortunate to have grown up in this family.
His Dad grew up on the poor side of lower, middle class. They never had much but managed to have enough. He managed to make do. Oscar never had a new bike. He bragged that he never worried that it would get stolen. And, even if it did, there was no doubt he would make do until he could get another one. It was a family tradition.
His Mom was the ultimate Depression baby. She could stretch money, food, and anything else until it covered what she needed covering. If she ran out, she assumed it was not all that important. And, if it was important, she saved up for it. Oscar always had a full stomach, and his clothes were clean, even if they had a patch or two. Oscar was okay with not knowing, because he felt safe, secure, and loved.
Oscar was comfortable with “I don’t know.” He did not assume that the world was out to get him. The world was not something he feared. He was okay with it being a mystery. This gave him a natural resilience. During “hard times” he found a way to make do. For him it was a way of life that he understood from birth. Mystery was not the enemy.
Some of his friends had far easier lives. But when they hit a big hurdle, many just gave up. They let their fears and inexperience with hurdles get to them. They worried and fretted about stuff that had not happened yet. Oscar believed that they didn’t know any better.
Some of his friends believed that the world was against them. Many went to church to protect themselves from the evil in the world. Others did not believe there was anything that could protect them. Their lives were driven by fear. That fear led them to try and control as much of their world as they could. But Oscar did not feel the fear of the unknown. Nor did he feel driven to explain and control it.
Strangely, Oscar found comfort in those “I don’t knows.” He found great solitude and rest for his weary soul in the mystery that surrounded him. He does not take responsibility for the universe. He fixes what he can, but he is not responsible for what happens beyond his control! Oscar is at peace with the world. He lives in it and allows it to unfold without unnecessary interference from him. Oscar believes that the mystery is a place to rest his weary soul.
Ultimately, Oscar goes to sleep each night with hope. This lets him to rise the next morning to face another day, expecting that somehow things will work out. The world is not against us. In fact, all creation is on the side of life itself. And if we too seek life for all, we will have ample reasons to find hope in the mystery and rest for our weary souls.
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